//* love

Wednesday, September 06, 2006

` 060906..Wednesday..

Morning wake up at 6 something..than go toilet wash up..than go back slp again..than 7 something my favourite loud alarm song woke mi up again..lolz..than get prepared jiu go out meet up wif vinz n dor..mood might b quite unpleasant..at tat moment jus feel like crawling n hiding inside a hole...nt lettin anyone see mi n tok to mi as i might blow out..haiz..bo bian..than reach swimming complex..went to change out..than went swim..wan hui n her mum came..than swim swim..tok tok..erm..still ok la..anyway i go there n swim for my own sake ma..no matter how furious things gonna happen is also none of my business as i'm goin on my own sake..no one points a gun on my head..so still ok la..than enjoy myself quite alot..haiz..but my swimming timing really drops very far..last time can b calculated in seconds..but now..1 min..haiz..gonna buck up..gonna swim again one of the in tis week...erm..after swim went to lot 1..than buy bubble bubble tea..lolz.than went walk walk..very tired liao..than somemore no money no tok..than suggested to go home..sry ya vinz..nt i don wan to pei u go here n there..jus we might b tired today..than somemore i don like goin out when i don have money..tats mi..sry..hope u;ll understand..than unhappinest brought over vinz..his family..himself..jus hope he will b alright n walk on..even if no more energy..i'll cum n piggy back u n bring u thru...tats a promise..n i've been wanting to tell u..kors r nt everything..there r still others who care more than they do...b more aware of tat someone ba...haiz..u might get furious of some of the things i said..but jus wanna noe how i felt everytime..as u said b4..no matter wat..jus sae it out to u..tats wat i;m doin now..so hope u can slowly undeerstand ba..than go home liao very tired than go slp..than wake up..cook dinner..than watch tv..online..chat..bla bla bla..than do housework..haiz..vinz so unhappy today..or rather everyday..but jus hope things might change ba..he also have to depend much on himself ba..haiz..nvm..than later gonna slp le.gonna go out tomoro ba..wanna go find job..mayb..or..haiz..don noe la..
recently i really met lots of prob..today jus said to someone..cause is really cannot tahan liao..i bear wif it for many days le..tats y its bothering mi everyday n my mood is like tat...all is b;cos of money MoNeY MONEY !!!!!! urgh.... haiz..no one will eva tinks tat tracy ang yu shian will eva end in tis kind of situation ba..of anyone is goona die..than i shall b the one in front of them ba..my situation is realy die lo..only u all don noe..even those who noes liao also don noe how to help mi even though they sae they wan to help mi..its really something which is unbearable..than something really don noe how to go settle..haiz...how i wish a rich guy cld appear in my life now..lolz..i've nv eva been troubled over money thingy lo..nv eva..haiz..i realy don noe how to face family..face my friends..i cant do tis cant do tat wif them..haiz..recently i need money badly n i stil tink of bad solution lo..wat also tink..physical also tink..emotional also tink...haiz..wat a stupid mind indeed..relaly don noe how le la..yu shian ar yu shian..wat happen to u seh..y suddenyl so cham..y ur friend all cant b up to ur help...y theres no ppl who can help u out in ur friend circle ..in ur life ??? argh..haiz...i really don noe wat to do..how i wish i were drown or uncouncious..than nt to wake up..but i noe i cant...no matter how serious de matter it is ..i must endure thru..i musnt b so fragile..i must zhen zuo..friends..endure n go thru wif mi hao ma ?! now u all r always there..tats the pillar of strength of mine..vinz..u too...jiayou

Tracy

Guardian Angel Paradise @ 10:43 PM